Initiating Respectful Dialogue in 4 Steps

—a guide to help you better navigate and approach difficult conversations

Step 01

State the Facts

using neutral descriptions to outline behaviours and facts. Use statements like "I saw…", "I heard…", and "I read…" ex. "Sometimes when we're having a meeting, I see you using your phone."

Step 02

State the Impact of Your Observations

such as feelings and emotions. Use statements like "I feel…" then what the impact is on the organization, the clients, the expected results, the team morale, etc. ex. "When I see this, I feel upset because it seems like you don't care about what I have to say. This makes me lose confidence in my work."

Step 03

State What You Need

In a clear manner making it simple to understand. Use statements like "because I need…" ex. "I need to feel comfortable sharing my thoughts and ideas with you."

Step 04

Make Your Request Respectfully

And politely to avoid negative reactions from the person you're speaking with. Use statements like "would you agree to…" or "would you mind…" ex. "Would you agree to not use your phone when we're having a meeting?"