The power of plain language:
Writing for government

1. Identify your reader and your objectives

Ask:

• Who are your readers?
• Why are you writing to them?
• What do they want to know?
• What action do they want to perform?

Example: Identify your reader and your objectives

Before:

Much of the history that we celebrate surrounds the voyageurs and the fur trade none of which may have transpired without the seemingly herculean efforts of courageous explorers like Cartier and Champlain but that still doesn't answer the original question "Why is the park named after Samuel de Champlain?"

After:

"Come explore Samuel de Champlain Provincial Park and find out why this park takes his name" or "Samuel de Champlain Provincial Park—Explore the land Champlain discovered".

2. Organize your ideas

• Make an outline of your ideas.
• Put important information first.
• Organize the rest of the information in a logical order.
• Put extra information at the end, and keep only if relevant.
• Create headings and subheadings.
• Use the inverted pyramid.

Example: Organize your ideas

Before:

The forms you submitted to act as a third-party administrator will be carefully reviewed and assessed before an individual's, agency's or organization's request for trusteeship is granted or declined. It is important to note that Service Canada-appointed trustees and organizations undertake the responsibility to administer benefits in the best interest of the individuals they represent. When the review is complete, Service Canada will contact you to advise you if your request to act as a third-party administrator has been granted.

After:

Reviewing your request : Thank you for your application. A committee will review your request to be a third-party administrator and make a decision based on all the details you have provided.

Receiving an answer: Once the committee reaches a decision, a Service Canada representative will contact you to give you the results.

Note: [or remove this text altogether]

Responsibility of third-party administrators: If you are appointed as a third-party administrator, you will be responsible to act in the best interest of the person you are representing.

3. Use everyday words

• Use simple, short words.
• Avoid complex words, longer words.
• Use less formal language.
• Avoid abstract ideas or concepts.
• Remove filler words and redundant words.

Example: Use everyday words

Before:

Failure of recollection is common. Innocent misrecollection is not uncommon.

After:

People often forget things or make mistakes in what they remember.

How sentences sometimes get inflated

From this...

In 2012, 500 new Canadians were able to find the jobs they wanted by enrolling in the Foreign Credential Recognition Program. (21 words)

To this... in no time!

In 2012, the reporting of the Statistics Canada study entitled "New Canadians and foreign credential recognition in Canada: The numbers for 2012 – A case study," among others, stipulated ipso facto that the filling of various employment opportunities that were sought by some 500 new Canadians who emigrated to Canada during the said period from across the globe came about through their enrolment in the federal government's Employment and Social Development's Foreign Credential Recognition Program, notwithstanding other circumstances that may have contributed to the situation. (84 words!)

4. Avoid noun strings, jargon and inflated language

• Avoid strings of three or more nouns:
  Break up strings or rewrite by using alternate words to explain.
• Avoid meaningless, formal or bureaucratic language or jargon:
  Use simple words to explain complicated ideas.
• Use specific examples to help illustrate complicated concepts.

Example: Avoid noun strings, jargon and inflated language

Before:

Given the magnitude of implementing this second enterprise resource planning system and the resulting transformation of system enabled business processes, an integrated and robust communication, engagement and change management plan was implemented, along with a targeted approach to training according to employee role and responsibility within the organization. Business processes were also aligned to system functionalities in time.

After:

The Department's goal was to adjust business processes gradually as it brought the new human resources tool online. By planning for this change, sharing information with employees and encouraging participation in specialized training, the project team aimed for a smooth transition.

Exercise for Tip 4: Avoid noun strings

Sentence

The committee discussed the program application fee increase proposal.

Possible solution

The committee discussed the proposal to increase the application fee for the program.

Exercise for Tip 4: Avoid jargon

Email

Possible solution

5. Write directly to the reader

• Identify who the reader is.
• Write to the reader, not about the population the text is about.

Example: Write directly to the reader

Before:

Although there is no evidence that animals can transmit the disease to humans, prevention and identification of ticks in animal fur is the key to preventing infected ticks from being transported into houses and yards.

After:

There is no proof that you can get Lyme disease from your pets. But you can get it from the infected ticks they bring into your house or yard!

Check your pets' fur often and remove any ticks that you find.

Exercise for Tip 5: Writing to the reader using "you"

Sentence:

By October 1, registered voters will get a voter information card in the mail at the address we have on file for them.

Possible solution

If you are a registered voter, you will get your voter information card in the mail by October 1 at the address we have on file.

6. Use bulleted lists

• Create bulleted lists to:
  • replace enumerated items in a sentence
  • show the steps involved in a process
  • make it easy to find information
• Introduce your list with a full or partial sentence.
• Use full sentences, phrases or single words or terms as your list items.
• Start all phrases with the same type of word.

Example: Use bulleted lists

Before:

Applying for a new Social Insurance Number (SIN), confirming an existing SIN, or requesting an amendment to a SIN record must be done in person at your nearest Service Canada office. Original proof-of-identity documents will be required. If everything is in order, your request will be completed during your visit. For more information or to find your nearest Service Canada office, visit our website at www.servicecanada.gc.ca or call 1-800-622-6232.

After:

You must visit a Service Canada office in person with original proof-of-identity documents if you want to:

• apply for a new Social Insurance Number (SIN)
• confirm an existing SIN
• change information in a SIN record

If everything is in order, your request will be completed during your visit.

For more information or to find your nearest Service Canada office:

• visit servicecanada.gc.ca
• call 1-800-622-6232

7. Avoid turning verbs into nouns

Example: Avoid turning verbs into nouns

Before:

The committee made a decision to bring about changes to the policy.

After (better):

The committee decided to change the policy.

After (better still):

The committee changed the policy.

Exercise for Tip 7: Activating your sentence by reactivating your verbs

Sentence

The automation of a number of steps involved in the process will result in a reduction in the number of person hours.

Possible solution

If we automate a few steps in the process, we will reduce the number of person hours.

8. Write short, simple sentences

• Reduce
  • the number of words in your sentences
  • the number of complex words
  • the number of sentences in your paragraphs
• Include one idea per sentence.
• Break up long sentences (two is often better than one!).
• Use online tools to help estimate readability level.*

* Readability tools:

• http://www.readabilityformulas.com/free-readability-formula-tests.php
• Hemingway

Example: Write short, simple sentences

Before:

It is your responsibility to contact your loan providers to set up a repayment schedule before you have to start making payments after the six month non- repayment period, even though loan providers will try to contact you via mail or phone; it is still your obligation to set up and manage your loan payments should they not be able to reach you. (F-K = 26.5, G-F = 30)

After (better):

It is your responsibility to contact your loan providers to set up a repayment schedule before the six month non-repayment period is over. Loan providers will try to contact you by mail or phone, but it is your obligation to set up and manage your loan payments. (F-K = 11.3, G-F = 15.5)

After (better still):

It is up to you to repay your loan. You must contact your loan provider(s) before the six month non-repayment period is over to set up how and when you will repay your loan. (F-K = 6.8, G-F = 10.5)

9. Use the active voice

Active:

The "doer" of the action is right up front.

• The dog ate the bone.
• You must name your fear before you can banish it.

Passive:

The "doer" of the action is near the end of the sentence (or even missing).

• The bone was eaten. (by the dog?)
• Named must your fear be before banish it you can. —Yoda quote

Example: Use the active voice

Before:

This is to inform you that the problem was rectified and the issuance of the Monthly Statement of Accounts has been re-established and will continue to be mailed to you on a monthly basis.

After (better):

We have rectified the problem. We will begin to re-issue your Monthly Statement of Accounts and will continue to mail them to you.

After (better still):

We have fixed the problem. From now on, you will receive a statement every month.

Exercise for Tip 9: Spotting the passive voice and using the active voice instead

Sentence

A request must be made before a refund will be issued.

Possible solution

"You must request a refund before we can issue it." or "You must ask for a refund before we can send it." or "Please fill out the request form and mail it to Service Canada for your refund."

10. Use formatting and layout to highlight your information and keep your reader's attention

• Highlight important text.
• Use headings and sub-headings.
• Use relevant and meaningful images when appropriate.
• Include colour to draw attention and create interest.
• Leave some white space.
• Choose your font wisely.
• Use tables to display data when appropriate.
• Increase the accessibility* of your texts.

Suggestions to increase accessibility

Fonts:

Use sans-serif fonts (e.g. Arial, Verdana) for web content, size 12.

Formatting:

• Include space in your layout, bolded text and bullets for emphasis.
• Avoid columns, italics, text boxes and tables, if they can be replaced by simple formatting instead.
• Always apply heading styles to titles and subtitles and apply table headers to your table cells (using options in Word).

Colour:

Use high contrast colours for text and background, and use patterns along with contrasting colours in tables and graphs.

See Color Contrast Testerand Color Contrast Spectrum to test combinations and WCAG 2.1 section 1.41. Use of Color for criteria.

Images, tables and graphs:

Provide a) Alternative text (Alt text) or b) good captions and longer descriptions within the text body, below the images.

See the Canada.ca Content Style Guide (Images and videos) and Creating accessible Microsoft Word 2010 documents (Accessible Digital Office Document Project) for more information on accessibility.

Alt text

Add a brief Alt text to all images and objects, if different from the caption or if no caption is included:

• Right click your image/object
• Select Format Picture/ Object/Chart Area; or select Table Properties for tables
• Select Alt Text
• Fill in a brief Description

Make sure you answer the question "what information is the image or object conveying?"

Example: Use formatting and layout to highlight your information and keep your reader's attention

Before:

• Take Chloe and Jade and their one-year-old daughter, Jess.
• Their family net income is $65,000. They will get $3,950 a year in benefits in one simple payment per month. Tax free.
• All Canadians deserve an opportunity to develop to their full potential.
• Because when you have an economy that works for the middle class, you have a country that works for everyone.
• Find out how the Canada Child Benefit can help your family at canada.ca/canada-child-benefit.

After:

Long Description

Meet this family of three: parents Chloe and Jade, and their child, Jess, who is under 6 years of age. They will receive $3,950 per year in Canada Child Benefit because their annual net family income is $65,000. Use the Canada Child Benefit calculator at Canada.ca/Canada-child-benefit to find out how much your family could get. Visit #CanadaChildBenefit and Canada.ca/ESDC for more information.

Recap: Apply a few tips... Make all the difference!

• Use headings
• Identify your reader
• Put important information first and organize ideas
• Write directly to the reader
• Use the active voice
• Use everyday words
• Turn nouns back to verbs
• Write short sentences
• Use formatting and layout
• Use bulleted lists

Before:

Apprenticeship Grants contribute to the Government's efforts of building a skilled trades labour force that demonstrates demand-driven responsiveness to today's skilled trades labour market needs. Two integrated programs in support of apprentices in the Red Seal trades are offered: the Apprenticeship Incentive Grant (AIG) and the Apprenticeship Completion Grant (ACG).

After:

Wrap-up

What have you learned?

• Canadians need plain language and so do your colleagues!
• Always write for your reader.
• Writing in plain language can save time and money.
• You can increase the power of your words by using plain language!

Sources

• Plain Language Association International
• Skills in Canada: First Results from the Programme for the International Assessment of Adult Competencies (PIAAC), published by Statistics Canada, Employment and Social Development Canada and Council of Ministers of Education Canada (CMEC), 2013
• PIAAC in Canada: Key Findings, Council of Ministers of Education Canada (CMEC)
• Plain Language Action and Information Network (PLAIN)
• Plain Language and Writing for the Web – How to make your content clear, logical, and accessible, Plain Language Action and Information Network (PLAIN)
• Easy does it!: Plain language at Transport Canada, Transport Canada, 2015
• Plain Language Building Results, Graham Young, Centre for Continuing Education, University of

Ottawa

• Decreasing mental burden with plain language, Iva Cheung, November 2016
• Plain Language & Readability, Presentation and Tutorial, Health Sciences North
• Slide 10 sources: Plain Writing Act of 2010 ; Plain English Campaign, United Kingdom; Parliamentary Counsel Office, Scottish Government; Plain language in a South African context